Friday, June 17, 2011

Cutting the Apron Strings

The euphamisim sounds like its ripping off a band-aid or pushing a baby bird out of the nest, destined to fly or fall. IN many instances we talk about the mother letting go and moving on. Its so final. Just one moment and the cord has been cut. But as a mom with children venturing out and becoming their own people I realize its not a cord. Its more like a very very thick rope and each little choice we make cuts one strand of the rope. It started simple and I didn't even realize it. I think it first started when the children started bathing on their own. Then they prepared their own sandwich for lunch.

Some of the strands of the cord are more painful to cut than others. When I let them walk 3 blocks down the street without an adult it was scary, but very necessary step in the growing up process. Even more recently I have started dropping off the bigger kids for swim lessons and letting daddy pick them up. That means they are alone (but have supervision) for a longer while. They have to undress, shower and redress and then be ready to be picked up on time. Its a lot of steps they have to be responsible for. Each and every week they do this I get a pit in my stomach and watch the clock until they walk through the front door. And each and every week my husband walks through the door first and says "what kids?" when I ask him where they are as the kids follow about 4 steps behind them. That joke wasn't funny the first day and its not funny on the fourth day either.

That cord must be connected to my stomach. . . .

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