Sunday, March 9, 2008

Gray Hair

I noticed a new gray hair today while I was in the bathroom at the ER today. It wasn't there yesterday. Do you want to know why it is there today?

I was napping in the bedroom when I hear Connor crying and Lainy Ann say, "You're bleeding from the mouth. Quick go see Daddy!" Caskey met Connor at the door and I was already on my way out of the bed when I am hearing exclamations like "Oh My God" and "LESLIE!"

Connor's upper and lower lip were lacerated. Cut isn't even an accurate representation. It looked like someone had taken a razor bladed and sliced his lips wide open. There was no doubt it was an emergency room visit. The only question was who was going and what toys to take with us. But how did he sustain such an injury? Lainy Ann answered that question for us, "I threw a rock at him." I was envisioning a hand sized rock, but the cut was so severe that I was sure she mistaken and she had thrown a piece of glass or metal at him. A few simple words and Lainy Ann knew she shouldn't be asking questions, "Go get the rock."

This was more of a brick, it was larger than a softball. When we told the ER staff about the size of the rock they were shocked that a 5 year old would be able to throw a rock of that size. Even when I explained that she is the size of an average 7 or 8 year old they were amazed.

The ER visit went well and the staff was amazed at how calm Connor was. After he received the numbing shots he laid very still, bundled up, and closed his eyes, to avoid the bright light. At times I thought he had fallen asleep or passed out. He was SO still. And then when the PA started the stitch that would go just inside his bottom lip he opened his mouth wide so she would have better access. I was incredibly proud of his calm demeanor and helpfulness. It is truly in his nature to behave that way. This is not to say he didn't cry. The numbing shot was incredibly painful and he got about 8 injections. He screamed through the last two stitches saying, 'mommy'. But it could have been much worse.

In all he has 11 stitches in both his upper and bottom lip. The upper lip has a 2-level stitch. His lips are huge and purple and eating is very difficult. But he got a new electronic football game from the ER staff to reward him for his good behavior. That seems to be all he remembers since when he greeted Papa he first showed off his new toy and Spiderman sticker. Oh, and the 'treats' of Jello, yogurt, ice cream, and applesauce for the rest of the day are keeping him in good spirits as well.

Lainy Ann is in big trouble to say the least. She has had her swing taken away (from the swing set), she had to help clean up all the blood, she has to carry the rock for the remainder of the day (to remind her of what she did to Connor), and she had her bed canopy removed. We just peeked on her after lunch time and she has fallen asleep with the rock on her chest. Sadly, when we ask her why she is crying she tells us she misses her swing. We are hoping to teach her empathy and cause and effect. She truly hurt her brother today in an unprovoked action. She knows well enough not to throw rocks.

It has been a draining day an I'm not sure which is worse; comforting the injured child or teaching the attacker a lesson about hurting people. When someone hurts your child you want to lash out and protect them, even if it means hurting the attacker. Well, in this case its impossible. I want to protect them both. I don't want to punish Lainy Ann, but I don't want her to hurt another child either. I really wish she had just broken a window.


  1. Hi Leslie.

    Casually, I asked Caskey, "how's your lovely family?" -- He came to my desk and brought up your blog page.

    I loved it!!!! -- Thanks so much for sharing. Love-it, love-it!!!!!!

    Take care. -- Jacqi

  2. I am Jacqi Davis's friend in Detroit, Mi. She emailed me this reply. I must say that you and your husband are excellent parents. I can imagine how upset the both of you were to see one of your babies injuried. In spite of everything I think that you are ought to be commended on how well you handled the situation. I have twins sons and when they were about 4 years old one the twins hit the other twin in the back of the head and I sat in the emergency room with him too. So I too understand how you must have felt. Good Job!!!!!! This was such a cute story even though it hurt a whole lot:).
    Take can,----------Robin

  3. It is hard to know exactly how to punish, but I think carrying the rock for the remainder of the day was a really good one. No physical punishment involved; not just yelling in anger; and, yes, it gets the point across about not to do that.

  4. [...] hurts him or treats him with an injustice and he pleads her case. Once she threw a rock at him and he needed 11 stitches in his lip. When we asked him what happened he told us the rock hurt him, not Lainy Ann, but the [...]