Thursday, July 13, 2006

Scary Grasshopper!

I have never liked bugs. They scare me. I can handle anything smaller than a dime, maybe a nickel. But any bigger than that I call my husband to rescue me. If he is unavailable I will turn a cup upside down on the bug and wait until he gets home.

My girlfriend and I were on vacation in Oregon in the summer. We were with all three toddlers. Since it was summer time and we were literally in the middle of nowhere visiting with her father I left the windows cracked overnight. Being a city-girl I didn't think of the repurcussions.

The next day we drove about 15 miles down a 2-lane road to a local winery. They have a duck pond and goldfish. We thought it would be great fun for the kids and a nice break from being inside all day. We drove down the narrow dusty road and passed just two cars. We would see the occasional house and lots of fencing, but it was very different from our suburbian home.

We were 3/4 of the way to the winery when I discovered a HUGE grasshopper on my rear-view mirror. Now, I have read all the literature on not teaching children your phobias. But all of that went out the window as he climbed across the roof to my sun visor. I freaked out. I was no longer watching the road, just making sure that the grasshopper didn't fall on me. My dear girlfriend was brave - when she wasn't yelling at me to stop weaving. I told her to take care of it. And of course the kids are screaming and wondering why we are yelling at eachother.

I tried rolling down the window and the weaving was obviously not doing anything. My friend found a newspaper and held it between me and the grasshopper. That way if the grasshopper fell he would land on the newspaper. So I scooted down in my seat, looking like an old lady behind the wheel, keeping one eye on the road and the other on the newspaper.

I came screeching into the dirt parking lot, dust everywhere. I quickly threw the car in park and jumped out screaming. I hate bugs so much. And this one was big, at least 5 inches long. My dear friend found a cup, caught the grasshopper and released into the freedom of the duck pond. The kids were a little worried with all the screaming and hollering I was doing. But it was quickly forgotten when they saw the ducks.


  1. [...] But now that my second living son has been born, which brings my total of sons to 4, I have decided that I have to be more of a tomboy. If you see my other post about grasshoppers you will know that I hate bugs. So I have been very (not really) bravely killing spiders and other bug things. I hold in the squeals as I inch closer to the spiders (if my husband isn’t home). And then after I flush the offender down the toilet I hide in the bathroom so the kids won’t see me shudder. Did I mention I hate bugs?! YUCK! [...]

  2. [...] In our parenthood our antics have become safer, sort of. Caskey still thinks we are crazy and he worries when we are off on one of our projects or adventures. But he knows we are both smart and where my knowledge ends, hers begins, and visa versa. We bought a twin size mattress for Lainy Ann when she was 18-months old. I was pregnant (and nesting) and couldn’t wait for Caskey to help, nor wanted to pay the $50 delivery fee. But we forgot rope. So we loaded it in her truck and drove *very* slowly home, normally a 10 minute drive took 30 minutes with me driving behind her. But we got it done. Then we went to Oregon for two weeks. But you can read about that two-week trip here and the grasshopper incident. Its clear we still haven’t grown out of the giggling stage. [...]